I was not raised in a “christian” home. I did however have a very blessed upbringing, and I love my family. But I was not taught the teachings and love of Jesus through them. Yet, God still planted seeds in me and gently pulled my heart towards Him throughout my life.
It started with primary school. The RE (religious education) teachers from the local church would come to our school to teach us bible stories for about 1 hour a week. While listening to them, i developed such a hunger and thirst for Jesus. Even at a young age, I wanted to know Him-those stories just spoke hope and peace to my heart.
Come grade 6-7 I had a couple of Christian friends who were definitely witnesses of the Lord in my life. I asked them if i could attend youth group with them, so I did that a few times. I also then attended church with them for resurrection Sunday (Easter). Grade 8 I attended a Catholic high school, so RE was compulsory and I further learned about this man named Jesus. A girl in my grade who was a christian, would tell me about His miracles, and would share testimonies with me every Thursday during our sport time together. I said the sinners prayer with her, as it sounded great and what I wanted. But it was just a head prayer, it wasn’t a heart prayer. You know what I mean? I definitely wasn’t truly saved then. However, it was definitely seeds planted in my heart!
Grade 9 came, the dreaded grade 9 year! Where everyone in our society, is trying to work out the new found desire and maturity of independence, yet we are still called and treated like children… Throw in the picture hormones and unnecessary drama, and difficulties going on at home. Basically, everyone during that year at school are very confused, struggling and trying to find their feet and place in the world. Therefore it was and most the time a difficult year!
The devil was telling me lies, that everyone hated me and that I did not fit in. I was also stressed and depressed with school work and life! :P. Silly petty drama with friends, immature relationships with guys and a new found friend who I leaned on for everything. This friend introduced me to make up (not that I’m against it, just something that changed in my life through her) and trying to find happiness through boys. Essentially, my naivety and innocence, dramatically decreased. This resulted in doing things I did not really want to do. But I was depressed, anxious and lost, so I was frantically trying to find peace and joy through her.
Long story short and without sharing too much detail on the interweb yet ;), for some reason I felt she started pulling away from me and she was leaning more on her boyfriend at the time. That big open empty hole feeling then returned, as I was trying to use her to fill it. Which obviously she can’t! She is human, she too and every other human have their own struggles. So if they aren’t leaning on Jesus they can’t really solve your problems haha. Two broken people can’t lean on each other well.
Throughout this period of time, the negative thoughts I was struggling with, I knew were not mine. So I would cry out to Jesus to help me! I knew He was the answer but I didn’t know what to do or how to do it. It wasn’t my time yet, I had to come to the place of truly needing and wanting Him. But once my friend started treating me differently and no one else was able to fix that purposeless empty feeling I felt. I then started searching for something more…
All those seeds planted over the years came to bear fruit in my life! 🙂 Also a family friend mentioned to my mum a youth group her daughter went to. Mum mentioned it to me at the time, and so I asked if I could go! That was when my life changed for ever! The love, satisfaction and meaning to life that I had been searching for, was found!
I then proceeded to attend the church and I desperately needed Jesus! Which then led to me truly accepting Jesus as my Lord and saviour of my life, in my bedroom one day during February of 2010. Ever since then, I have known my purpose, I have had joy, peace, love and hope. So much hope! Jesus is my everything and my first love. He has been so good and faithful to me! He is a personal friend and the answer to anything you need and will ever need.
If you are searching and hungry and desiring something more? If you are looking for love and a purpose, I promise you that He will NEVER fail you!! Contact me if you need any more information or if you don’t know where to start in a relationship with Jesus. 🙂
Lots of Love,